In this chapter, we learn that every relationship is different. For each relationship, we achieve different levels of intimacy. The levels of intimacy are:
· hopes and dreams
· faults, failures and fears
· legitimate needs
Reading further, I learn that not all friends are on the same level. Nor should they be. Each relationship can serve different purposes for different people. The more intimate levels are harder to maintain, but more substantial.
To be more clear, the authors used the basket analogy to illustrate. Putting all friendships in one basket makes the relationship too stressful for both of you. Also, it doesn't give the friendship a chance to shine. Because you are too busy trying to make everything perfect. For example, I will highlight the most intimate stages of friendships. Baskets one and two.
In basket two, you have five to twenty friends . You talk beyond the surface with these friends. You share opinions and facts, often moving between levels.
Basket one holds one to four friends . These are your closest friends. You share your hopes and dreams. These are your friends of the heart; although they require the most time and trust, they are the most rewarding.